While driving home last weekend, I listened to the Maynard Moose story “Sleeping Beastly.” It has some flaws, but I was amused all over again by this sequence from the beginning of the story.
It's hard to do justice, in a transcription, to Maynard's inimitable intonations and pronunciations, but I'll try. But if you want to hear it for yourself, you can still pick up the whole album for $2.
Once a pon a time a queen give birth to a little baby girl.
And so beautiful was the baby girl that the king and queen invite the seventeen good fairies to the christening. And each one of the good fairies give the baby a name. They name her Honesty Bravery Cleverness Decency Vigor Politeness Obedience Gratitude Health Wealth Royalty Grace Faith Loyalty Duty And Beauty And Cutie-Pie.
But they called her Beauty for short.
Her growed up to be a beautyful princess. And one day her was walking through the forest trying to find some wild broccolis, her favorite vegetable, when all of a sudden her hear a tremulating sound. [Snoring sounds.] All the little furry forest amnimuls freak out, and the birds go twirp cheeple, bonk their heads on the trees and stuff, but Beauty is not afraid because . . . Bravery is her middle name.
I dunno, maybe you have to hear it to appreciate it. But it makes me laugh every time.