Of all sad words to hear when anyone working in Higher Education picks up the telephone, the saddest are these: My daughter is a freshman<\/i>.
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Your Humble Blogger works in a library of a University. My first call yesterday morning began with a woman saying my daughter is a freshman<\/i>; I should have stood in bed. It seems that the young student had been having trouble connecting to the wireless network in the library.
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Note<\/i>: there is no reason to believe that the student in question had been in the library, much less attempted to connect to the wireless network, but that’s the story her mother got, and no student lies to her mother.
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I assured the concerned parent that there is indeed a wireless network in the library, and that any student who was having trouble connecting to it should go to the IT help desk, which is staffed by students hired and trained by the IT people. If the student has any more problems, or can’t find the IT help desk, she can come by the circulation desk, said YHB, and we’ll help out.
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That’s great<\/I>, said the parent on the other end of the telephone wire. Can you call my daughter on her cell phone and tell her that?<\/i> YHB did not say the hell?<\/i> but something like I’m sorry<\/i> or I beg your pardon<\/i>, hoping to indicate some sense of the silliness of the request. It’ll be a mitzvah<\/i>, said the parent. Nu? A mitvah, now, to call on shabbos? Go figure!<\/i> YHB did not reply.
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In fact, I did call and leave a message on the poor young woman’s mobile, telling her that her mother was having some difficulty with our wireless and that she could come in and get assistance with it at any time. Thank the Divine that she wasn’t answering her phone; we are undoubtedly both mortified enough.
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But have you guessed the really tragic part? The tragic part is that in eleven years, if I’m really lucky, my Perfect Non-Reader will be a freshman.
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Tolerabimus quod tolerare debemus<\/I>,
-Vardibidian.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In Which Your Humble Blogger puts on his John Gielgud voice and asks if she wants me to wipe her dick for her, you little shit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[198],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11453","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-libraries"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11453","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11453"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11453\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18502,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11453\/revisions\/18502"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11453"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11453"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kith.org\/vardibidian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11453"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}