Holidays
On a totally unrelated note, Will pointed me to an entertaining article that answers the question "What would Xmas be like if it were a Jewish holiday?" Sadly, I don't know enough to get most of the jokes in the first half, but there are some funny bits even for those of us who've drifted so far we're practically goyim. And the Hagada at the end is great:
This is the fruitcake of our affliction, which our ancestors baked 400 years ago.
All who are in need, come and celebrate Xmas with us.
All who are hungry, come and partake of this 400-year-old fruitcake, as it is written, "Let them eat cake!"
This year we watch football in the living room, next year may the Super Bowl come to our city!
Best part:
There are four types of children who ask questions on Xmas: the wise one, the bad one, the simple one, and the one who does not know to ask.
- What does the wise one ask? I don't know; I couldn't understand him either. Him you must send to a school for gifted children.
- What does the bad one ask? He says, "What is this holiday to you?" Because he excludes himself from the community, you must exclude him from your table, and he will go back to his employer and get paid double-time and a half for working on Xmas day.
- What does the simple one ask? He simply asks, "What is this?" You will say to him, "This is dinner."
- As for the one who does not know to ask, you must go to his room, wake him up and say, "Next year, come to dinner on time!"