Dept. of Homeland Security, Jungle of Nool division

I’ve always wondered why the Kangaroo made such a big deal of Horton hearing the Who. I mean, yes, the elephant’s clearly crazy, but so what? Why bother going to so much trouble, with the black-bottomed eagle, and the beazle-nut oil, and all? Well, in the Chuck Jones cartoon version (which is, unsurprisingly, brilliant brilliant brilliant), it’s made clear by the Wickersham Brothers in their song (which I transcribed myself, on the go, so it’s probably chock full of errors):

We’re the Wickersham Brothers
We’re hotshot spotters of rotters and plotters
And we’re going to save our sons and our daughters from you
You’re a dastardly gastardly shnastardly shnook,
and you’re trying to brainwash our brains with this gobbledygook!

We know what you’re up to, pal. You’re trying to shatter our morale.
You’re trying to stir up discontent and seize the reins of government.
You’re trying to throw sand in our eyes and kill free enterprise
And raise the cost of figs and dates and drive up compound interest rates
And shut our schools and steal our jewels
And even change our football rules and lock us up in vestibules!

We’re the Wickersham brothers—we know your type!

Well, clearly, the Wickersham brothers, who, as they say, are experts in, um, and so on, easily spotted the link that was unclear to me between talking to Whos (who are not) and this whole vestibule business, a threat of which I hadn’t even been aware. Fortunately, as with all of Dr. Seuss’ whimsical verse, it’s pure fantasy. No lessons here for grown-ups.


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