“10 Reasons Why Your Dog Ignores Your Commands”

Recent spam subject line: “10 Reasons Why Your Dog Ignores Your Commands.” I didn’t read the email, but here’s what I assume it said:

  1. You don’t have a dog.
  2. Your commands are illegal, and your dog knows not to obey illegal commands.
  3. Your dog is an anarchist, and doesn’t believe in hierarchies.
  4. Your dog just doesn’t respect you.
  5. You forgot to precede your commands with sudo.
  6. You’re speaking a language that your dog doesn’t know.
  7. Your dog is busy doing more important things, such as eating, sleeping, running, and being distracted by squirrels.
  8. Your dog is so immersed in a book that they aren’t paying any attention to the world around them.
  9. You forgot to precede your commands with “Simon says.”
  10. Your dog is actually a cat.

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