Archive for Funny

Auto-translating sound effects

A friend recently posted (to Facebook) a video of an animal eating something, and added the following text as a commentary/description for the video: MONCH MONCH MONCH Facebook offered to translate that for me. I accepted the offer. Facebook’s translation read as follows: Monch monch monch monch monch monch It then offered to let me […]

Trek house rules

For a long time, I’ve been intermittently collecting fortune-cookie fortunes that I find entertaining with phrases like in bed or between the sheets added. The other day, Kam came up with a new-to-us variation: adding between the sheets after lines of dialogue in Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes. I didn’t write down any examples […]

Book-throwing quote

I recently had occasion to quote the line “It is not a book to be lightly thrown aside. It should be thrown with great force,” a variant of which I had always seen attributed to Dorothy Parker. But it’s my sad duty today to inform you that Parker may not have originated this joke. A […]

Cargo space

Cute joke: [first day as car salesman] Customer: Cargo space? Me: Car no do that. Car no fly. Manager: Can I see you in my office?— THE Burger King (@ABurgerADay) July 14, 2017 Not sure if that tweet is the origin of the joke, but it’s the earliest-dated version of it that I’ve found.


I saw a license plate a week or two ago that said MYRRRRH. Or maybe it was only three Rs, not sure. Either way, I liked it. My first thought was that it represented the sound of an engine smoothly purring. Later, I thought it might be a company name, or a band name, or […]

Pants revisited

(This post is more or less NSFW.) Back in column III (which includes some NSFW material), I wrote about a game in which you replace words from Star Wars quotations with the word pants. Years later, I came across a list of the Top 278 Star Wars Lines Improved By Replacing A Word With “Pants”. […]